Marriage seems to be the hot topic among my peers now.
Everytime when we gather, everybody seems to be asking, 'when's yours?' And my reply would always be, '5 years later.' Otherwise, we would share about each others' marriage plan.
During my younger days, I thought getting marry at around the age of 25-27 is ideal. And after 2 years of couplehood, then I would start my family. Now at the age of 25, I felt getting marry at this age was kinda early.....and kinda scary. ha!
Unfortunately, I'm not financially sound and my career is not stable. Neither is Xiang. So, to tie the knot is a no-no for both of us now. Moreover, I may not be the almost ideal wife of his, sad to say. On the other hand, after hearing all the planning thingy, I got scared. Its so much of hassle to get things done up beautifully to your expectation. Yes, I know marriage is every gals' once in a lifetime. So, obviously, I'm not ready!
My perceptions of marriage is all about love, responsibility and commitment. Without any of this factor, the marriage becomes meaningless. Many of us have actually heard stories of one being lead astray by all the temptations. And in some cases, its the kids that hold the family together. So, how powerful is this love, responsibility and commitment in marriage? Isnt it suppose to be like fairytales - lives happily ever after? Somebody please enlighten me.
Frankly speaking, I have no confident in my marriage. I fear that my husband would find love elsewhere. I couldnt accept the fact that there is no more love between us. And I couldnt accept the fact that its just the responsibility that keeps us together. And I couldnt accept that its just the commitment that holds the family together. In short, I couldnt allow the missing of any factors. Although nobody can predict the future, I still want a perfect marriage and family.
With Xiang, I have no doubts about his responsibility and commitment. As for love, i'm not sure. I found everything in him, except for his love. Sadly, I'm really not sure. Not sure if i should accept whatever may come? If so, I'm contradicting myself. Not sure if i should just let this relationship go? But, my love is enduring strong and unshaken.
All in all, I am thinking too much and too far. In rational, I should build my worth - career and finance now. As for relationship, I shall let nature takes its course and treasure whatever I have with Xiang.
Everytime when we gather, everybody seems to be asking, 'when's yours?' And my reply would always be, '5 years later.' Otherwise, we would share about each others' marriage plan.
During my younger days, I thought getting marry at around the age of 25-27 is ideal. And after 2 years of couplehood, then I would start my family. Now at the age of 25, I felt getting marry at this age was kinda early.....and kinda scary. ha!
Unfortunately, I'm not financially sound and my career is not stable. Neither is Xiang. So, to tie the knot is a no-no for both of us now. Moreover, I may not be the almost ideal wife of his, sad to say. On the other hand, after hearing all the planning thingy, I got scared. Its so much of hassle to get things done up beautifully to your expectation. Yes, I know marriage is every gals' once in a lifetime. So, obviously, I'm not ready!
My perceptions of marriage is all about love, responsibility and commitment. Without any of this factor, the marriage becomes meaningless. Many of us have actually heard stories of one being lead astray by all the temptations. And in some cases, its the kids that hold the family together. So, how powerful is this love, responsibility and commitment in marriage? Isnt it suppose to be like fairytales - lives happily ever after? Somebody please enlighten me.
Frankly speaking, I have no confident in my marriage. I fear that my husband would find love elsewhere. I couldnt accept the fact that there is no more love between us. And I couldnt accept the fact that its just the responsibility that keeps us together. And I couldnt accept that its just the commitment that holds the family together. In short, I couldnt allow the missing of any factors. Although nobody can predict the future, I still want a perfect marriage and family.
With Xiang, I have no doubts about his responsibility and commitment. As for love, i'm not sure. I found everything in him, except for his love. Sadly, I'm really not sure. Not sure if i should accept whatever may come? If so, I'm contradicting myself. Not sure if i should just let this relationship go? But, my love is enduring strong and unshaken.
All in all, I am thinking too much and too far. In rational, I should build my worth - career and finance now. As for relationship, I shall let nature takes its course and treasure whatever I have with Xiang.
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